Thursday, December 13, 2007

Guns and Other Fun

I talk about baby stuff a lot in this post. Sorry.

If you are married, did you register for gifts? I remember dragging M to T.arget and W.illiam S.onoma with much complaining on his part. He got that gun in his hand, though, and the next thing I knew we had registered for a wine fridge and a $1500 espresso machine. (We didn't get either one, thank goodness). A few weeks ago, M had a small meltdown about out baby shower. Neither one of us are really big fans of baby showers. Having suffered through many of them, I knew that if I did have one, it would have to be very non-traditional. Some very kind friends of ours are granting that wish, so off to T.arget I went. I have to admit, it was fun. I also registered on A.mazon for books and music. I refused to go to B.abies-r-U.s. I just can't seem to forgive that store for the way I used to feel when I walked into it. I know it's stupid, but I'm just not there, yet. After the shower meltdown that M had, I assumed he would not be interested in my trip to register. When I told him I was going, he said, "Without me?" I give up. We walked up and down the isles while he pointed out any blanket, bib or towel that had airplanes on it. The power of the gun strikes again.

Every Wednesday for the past three weeks M and I have been attending a "childbirth class". I didn't expect to learn anything new since I could probably open my own fertility and pregnancy bookstore, but they let you pre-register and you get a tour of the hospital. Last night was the hospital tour. Having never even set foot inside this hospital, I was very interested to see what the delivery rooms and nursery looked like. Everything seemed to be fine and everyone ooohed and aaahed over the brand new babies. I got the feeling that everyone tells me about - there's no turning back now. We also watched a C-Section video and more than one of the fathers looked like they weren't going to make it. I also had my 28 week appointment earlier in the day. We get another look at the baby in one month. What a loooong month this is going to be!

I've been feeling a bit melancholy lately. I don't know why. I certainly have so many things to grateful for, and I am very, very grateful. Perhaps being on the brink of such a big change in my life is making me more reflective. This time of year can be hard. I remember last year was tinged with a little bit of sadness that I didn't have any "good news" to give my parents as the ultimate gift. I thought that I would surely be pregnant by Christmas. My wish is that everyone's greatest hope comes true this year. I don't think I will ever forget how it felt to have that hope and not really know whether the next year would bring wanted I wanted so much.

Thank you all so much for your supportive comments on my last post. It really helped me to feel less alone in all of this. Please go and say congrats to Baby Moxie who had a wonderful ultrasound! I hope that everyone stays safe and warm this holiday season!


Fertilize Me said...

I am sorry that you are feeling a bit meloncholy. I hope it passes soon. All these emotions sometimes i think just jam up our circuit board. Thinking of you and glad you got to see the baby again

butterflyanla said...

I am thinking of you and M this holiday season. I think we all have a lot to be thankful for this year, even if all our prayers/dreams didn't come true. I hope your spirits lift soon. Happy Holidays.

Caro said...

We did register for gifts when we got married - it just seemed easier, especially since we had lived together for a while and didn't want duplicate stuff.

The baby shower isn't common in the UK (or Denmark) though so we won't be registering for baby stuff.

Hope you feel better soon.

seussgirl said...

Yey for non-traditional showers! How do I convince my friends of that? Hah! And can we PLEASE not play the candy in the diaper game?
Hoping the month of wait goes quickly!

Courtney said...

Thank you, thank you, thank you for always being so thoughtful and kind!

We did register for gifts when we got married, and I suppose will do that again for the little one. It is nice that your hubby wanted to participate (I do think the 'equipment' is part of the draw for the guys) in registering for the baby.

I can't believe that you are already taking childbirth classes! Time is seriously flying by!!! i hope the time flies equally as fast so that your u/s gets here in no time!

I hope that the sadness you are feeling goes away. The holidays really can be a tough time for all because most everyone is reminded of something that can't be covered in glitter or tied with a bow.

Hugs for you my friend.

Anonymous said...

Super fun! We registered not too long ago as well!