Tuesday, November 27, 2007

In the Beginning.....


JJ asked everyone to share their blog's birth story and I thought it was a good idea! I had to think for a moment about what made me start this one. I know that I was Googling furiously one day about why my period was out of whack after stopping birth control. Mine had gone missing shortly after stopping the pill and I was having 42 day cycles. I came across Uterine Wars and I couldn't stop reading. Soper tells her story of tests, miscarriages and finally a decision to adopt a little girl from Kazakhstan. I'm not doing it justice because she writes about things that touch you so deeply and still manages to make you laugh out loud. I never really thought about adoption or my feelings about adoption and what it means for the parents involved as well as the child. It was very educational and I am so glad I found it. She will probably never see this, but thank you. You don't know how much you helped me. I also found Julie's blog around the same time and was equally touched by her honesty. Through Julie's big list I was able to find many of the blogs I read on a daily basis and the people that I now consider friends. I realized that my feelings did not own me when I was able to write them down and that I could do it in a safe environment by hiding in plain sight in the vastness of cyberspace. To this day only my husband and one good friend know about my blog and I will probably keep it that way.

I also want to take this opportunity to thank everyone who writes. I often feel like an outsider since I got pregnant before many of my questions were answered. I haven't been through half of what some of the bloggers have been through, but even tasting a little bit of that pain has made me admire the perseverance and honesty that so many people display through their writing. If I had gotten pregnant right away I would probably be one of the jerks that you write about, but I feel like I have been saved from jerkdom and humbled by your kindness and openness. Things that I might have taken for granted will never be viewed with anything but wonderment and gratitude. Thank you all for that gift.

4 comments:

Fertilize Me said...

It's fun finding out how everyone got into bloggin'. i nneed to write one.

Courtney said...

Thank YOU for the gift that you share with all of us! It is always great to hear about what is happening with you and baby both. :)

And thank you for always being so supportive! Keep writing!!!

Pamela Jeanne said...

I'm convinced if I'd ever gotten pregnant I'd be hanging out in jerkdom, too. I didn't so here I am trying to figure out how to co-exist with the jerks. Just knowing there are other people who recognize that jerks exists makes the experience easier to bear. Glad you started blogging away. We'll need your voice in the mommy clubs to help convert a few jerks along the way.

JJ said...

Thanks for writing this beautiful BYVM post!